Reflections on the Anniversary of my Daughter's Passing

Today Friday January 28 2011 marks the 5th anniversary of my beloved daughter Cheri Anne Cottrell’s passing. Cheri was 38 years young when she decided to make the transition. I reflect here as I have often said to audiences, groups and clients too, that Cheri came into this world with a divine purpose and if it were not for Cheri and her precious life with us “you and I would not be talking." I will reiterate that here.

Cheri went through a lot during her young life. She suffered through a difficult birth and later the painful probing and examinations of highly skilled medical people, whose examinations, knowledge, and skills were fruitless in determining the cause of her seizures (or how to stop them).

After extensive and exhaustive medical examinations by doctors and specialists in hospital after hospital and clinic after clinic, the collective conclusion was to place Cheri in an institution (may you as a parent, never face such a choice). Arrangements were reluctantly made for Cheri to leave the family for a “bed” in a faraway institution or “home” for “retarded” and “handicapped children” near Bellville Ontario. My wife Karen and I cried as we drove away from “that place” in 1972 and I am almost crying now as I remember that fateful day. Cheri was on a mission in her life, and we didn’t even know it.

You see, out of that tragedy came enlightenment for Cheri’s family. Make no mistake: to have a handicapped child is a huge burden. The costs are enormous, and the time commitment is 24 hours a day for life. A parent automatically becomes an advocate for the helpless and dependent, as its not easy being in the home care system. You are treated with suspicion always, and your governmental case worker is either an angel who has a willingness to help you, or a demon that holds back services and funds for reasons that are usually absurd.

If you know of such a family or have a “special” child in your extended family, give them money often (they need it) and spend some time with that child. Babysit the child, so the parents can have a rest, or go to a movie. Make a commitment to read a book, or play with the special person for one hour a week and keep the commitment up. I can’t promise benefits will come or you. But I do believe they will. You might be earning good Karma or shedding bad Karma. I can only reflect on the huge blessing Cheri gave to us.

When things look hopeless in the world, then look to the Great Beyond for Divine help. It is available. Angels are everywhere, and other saints and Avatars are in the world here and now. Your question is: “Where are they?” My answer is: “Look for them.” Don’t believe naively. “Faith is built upon Belief, and Belief is built upon EVIDENCE”. Look everywhere to find answers with evidence which is truthful! The Divine has a way of working with you, but you have to ask first. The old parable of "knocking and seeking and ye shall find" is as valid today as it was in the time when Jesus the Christ walked the Earth.

Always wanting to know if something could be done for Cheri, my friend and coworker Bill O. at the Toronto Star newspaper handed me a book “There Is A River” about an American intuitive of the 1940s era. This remarkable man was the Great Mr. Edgar Cayce, who was documented as being able to psychically see what was wrong with a person’s health and give remedies that might be helpful for them. This chance encounter with Bill gave me and my family hope. "Where can I find such a man like Cayce?" I would pray.

Divine intervention came to us through the ability of a very intuitive man. In 1974, Mr. “Ross Peterson” (aka Peter Weber) was a guest on the Allen Spraggett TV show “ESP: Extra Special People” (1974). He was doing a “deep trance meditation” health reading on a person who was not present. A doctor, Logan Stanfield, was a guest on that show, evaluating this “psychic phenomena”. Mr. Peterson’s intuitive ability was amazing and his account of the person's health was correct, according to the doctor.

Here at last was THE man that could tell Karen and I what, if anything, could be done for Cheri.

Soon after contacting Mr. Peterson in Toronto, Karen and I had our first “psychic” reading. We were terrified and excited at the same time. I was 24 years old. The universe was opening and I didn’t even know it.

The reason for Cheri’s seizures and subsequent placement in the “home” was due to cervical (neck) bones (Atlas and Axis vertebrae) pinching her spinal cord. Here at last was an explanation or reason for Cheri’s condition. And the “medications” she was taking were “poisoning her” (he said) I immediately thought, "no one told him she was on medication." Here was an answer that made sense to me. Why didn’t the medical doctors tell us this was the reason she was convulsing after her difficult birth? I leave that answer open to speculation.

Based on the strength of this DTM reading, my wife and I decided to boldly go ahead and bring our dear Cheri home. This was, of course, against the wisdom of the older and wiser “well intended” relatives not to do so. These were the ones who never visited Cheri in Belleville, nor supported us in any way prior to Cheri being placed in the institution. The staff, also being well intended, threatened that Cheri would loose her “bed” (or place) if we didn’t return her within two weeks. Cheri’s life expectancy (we were assured) was eight to twelve years. At that time, Cheri was six and a half years old. Cheri was coming home, as she had a chance (albeit a slim one, but it was a chance) for a life, instead of a living death in a place far from her family.

From that day to this, Cheri has been an inspiration to me, my family, and many others. Indeed, we may have trying times or challenges, but pain wakes us up; pleasure puts us to sleep. The secret is to look for solutions or alternatives, and never stop until you find a remedy. The intuitive way, using spiritual gifts like dreams and visions or clairvoyance or gut feelings and hunches, is a way to start. Mr. Cayce and Mr. Peterson (and Mr. Paul Solomon), "the Sleeping Prophets," have shown that there is a metaphysical way and/or a spiritual way to overcome any challenge life may throw at you. Most importantly, those problems that seem overwhelming may be, in the long run, a blessing which opens your mind to the spiritual and Divine dimensions or heavens above in the Great Beyond.

Cheri enriched my life and I didn’t even know it at the time. Cheri was an angel in disguise. Her life has been the light which guided us over the last thirty-six years or so. It was Cheri laying on her bed with that ever-present smile and that cheerful laughter, never saying a word, never enjoying any of the pleasures of life that we take for granted, ever trusting and being patient, that I and my family would get on the path which I believe we are now on.

My wife loved Cheri, and her sister Louise and brothers Doug and Jason think of her often. We don’t grieve. Instead we feel we have been blessed. Today we think of her and all the wonderful times Cheri had with us. Today I am grateful for her courage and willingness to help me in her way find my life’s work. May the angels and the Divine beings above bless Cheri and keep this great Soul in their bosom of the ever-lasting light.

Always remembered,
Love Dad

When it comes to life…. the critical thing is whether you take things for granted or take them with gratitude.
Gilbert K. Chesterton